Astronomically Bad Jokes (Or good)

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neufer
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We eat ham and jam and spam a lot.

Post by neufer » Fri Sep 28, 2012 4:43 am

Click to play embedded YouTube video.
We're Knights of the Round Table,
We dance when ere we're able,
We do routines and chorus scenes
With footwork impeccable.
We dine well here in Camelot,
We eat ham and jam and spam a lot.
We're Knights of the Round Table,
Our show are formidable,
But many times, we're given rhymes
That are quite unsingable.
We're Opera mad in Camelot,
We sing from the diaphragm
a looooooot.
In war we're tough and able,
Quite indefatigable,
Between our quests we sequin vests,
And impersonate Clark Gable.
It's a busy life in Camelot,
I have to push the pram a lot.
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Ann
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Re: Astronomically Bad Jokes (Or good)

Post by Ann » Fri Sep 28, 2012 5:07 am

Moonlady wrote:
Ann , I know Sir Lunch-a-lot who was at King Arthur's round table too...
Lunch-a-lot!I bet he did! :lol2: :lol2: :lol2:

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Re: Astronomically Bad Jokes (Or good)

Post by Ann » Wed Oct 03, 2012 12:16 am

Time for another joke. I bet someone has told it already.

I wondered why the ball kept getting bigger.
Then it hit me.
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Beyond
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Re: Astronomically Bad Jokes (Or good)

Post by Beyond » Wed Oct 03, 2012 1:04 am

Ann wrote:Time for another joke. I bet someone has told it already.

I wondered why the ball kept getting bigger.
Then it hit me.
Ann
ha-ha, i remember that joke from a while back, somewhere. If i recall correctly, i think it has some owl feathers attached to it.
To find the Truth, you must go Beyond.

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Re: Astronomically Bad Jokes (Or good)

Post by Ann » Wed Oct 03, 2012 1:14 am

Okay... I wondered why the owl kept getting bigger... :shock:

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Re: Astronomically Bad Jokes (Or good)

Post by Ann » Wed Oct 03, 2012 4:56 am

A childish canine joke that is just rubbish really, but I hope Owlice hasn't told it yet...

A dog gave birth to puppies near the road...
and was cited for littering.
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Moonlady
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Re: Astronomically Bad Jokes (Or good)

Post by Moonlady » Fri Oct 05, 2012 2:30 am

intergalactic rights movement...
intergalactic rights movement...

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Re: Astronomically Bad Jokes (Or good)

Post by BMAONE23 » Fri Oct 05, 2012 5:04 am

Did you hear about the man that couldn't afford a personalized license plate for his car?
He petitioned to have his name changed to 5AXF357

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Re: Astronomically Bad Jokes (Or good)

Post by Ann » Fri Oct 05, 2012 5:11 am

I don't get it, I'm afraid. I'm a dense one, I am!

Here's another one, to your health:

When you've got a bladder infection
urine trouble.
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geckzilla
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Re: Astronomically Bad Jokes (Or good)

Post by geckzilla » Fri Oct 05, 2012 2:22 pm

The guy couldn't change his license plate to his name so he changed his name to his license plate. Luckily for him, that license plate spells out Saxfest in leet speak so it's actually not that bad of a name, especially if you like saxophones.
Just call me "geck" because "zilla" is like a last name.

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Re: Astronomically Bad Jokes (Or good)

Post by BMAONE23 » Fri Oct 05, 2012 5:09 pm

geckzilla wrote:The guy couldn't change his license plate to his name so he changed his name to his license plate. Luckily for him, that license plate spells out Saxfest in leet speak so it's actually not that bad of a name, especially if you like saxophones.
Leave it to Geckzilla to find the occult meanings

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Re: Astronomically Bad Jokes (Or good)

Post by geckzilla » Mon Oct 08, 2012 5:25 pm

Just call me "geck" because "zilla" is like a last name.

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neufer
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Mother of all Bad Jokes!

Post by neufer » Mon Oct 08, 2012 6:16 pm

geckzilla wrote:
. :shock: :cry: http://i.imgur.com/CUcHv.gif
  • Please Don't Click to view full size image :!:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mother_of_all wrote:
<<"Mother of all..." has become a stock phrase in English-language public discourse and popular culture. It implies the largest or most significant example of a class, which completely overshadows all other cases in the class. For example, "the mother of all battles" would imply the largest, most destructive, most significant battle ever fought.

The phrase "the mother of all..." was popularized in recent years, though not introduced, by Saddam Hussein, then President of Iraq, after the invasion of Kuwait in 1990. Bulletins to Iraqi citizens advised them to prepare for an invasion and "the mother of all battles" if the US-led coalition forces attempted to evict his army of occupation from Kuwait. The phrase "mother of all battles" in this instance was a translation of the Arabic expression Umm al-Ma'arik. This is a common trope in Arabic public rhetoric. As Saddam's audience would have understood, it refers to the Battle of al-Qādisiyyah in AD 637, when an Arab army defeated the Persians.

The expression "the mother of all" has spread widely through English-language media and culture. It continues to be widely used: Time magazine headed its story on the 2008 financial crisis "Washington Prepares the Mother of All Bailouts". In the same context the Wall Street Journal referred to "The Mother of All Mondays". Massive Ordnance Air Blast munitions (MOAB) have been nicknamed "Mother of all bombs" due to their identical acronyms.

In 1994, the term was retroactively applied to "The Mother of All Demos", a 1968 demonstration of several then-new computer technologies, such as the computer mouse and hypertext.

The phrase "the mother of all..." had been used in the past in the sense of the origin of all of a particular class of things, rather than the most significant. In that context, Benjamin Franklin in Poor Richard's Almanack (1755) wrote, "A full Belly is the Mother of all Evil." In the same sense, the phrase was used in the King James Version of the Bible in 1611 (Galatians 4:26, "But Jerusalem which is above is free, which is the mother of us all") and in the literal sense regarding Eve as "mother of all living" (Genesis 3:20).

Phrases such as "mother of all wisdom" exist at least as far back as 1853.>>
Art Neuendorffer

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Re: Astronomically Bad Jokes (Or good)

Post by Beyond » Mon Oct 08, 2012 8:56 pm

I was wondering what geckzilla's post was about. Then i read neufer's post, where he is quotationally explaining that it is the mother of all mother jokes.
So... that would make geckzilla, the Mother of the mother of all mother jokes posted here. She must have gotten that ability from her 'zilla' side. :lol2:
Youse guys is lottsa fun :!: I think I'll go click on the larger size picture and see if the computer starts shakeing. :mrgreen:
To find the Truth, you must go Beyond.

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Re: Astronomically Bad Jokes (Or good)

Post by geckzilla » Mon Oct 08, 2012 9:01 pm

Ha, well, it is the second time I have posted a Your Mom joke in the thread. I can't take credit for the gif animation, though. That one goes to the Great Unknown of the Internet.
Just call me "geck" because "zilla" is like a last name.

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Re: Astronomically Bad Jokes (Or good)

Post by Moonlady » Mon Oct 08, 2012 9:58 pm

Mothers rule!!! or women 8-)
Attachments
No chance...(credit to the unknown women)
No chance...(credit to the unknown women)
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Re: Astronomically Bad Jokes (Or good)

Post by Moonlady » Wed Oct 17, 2012 6:24 am

crop field revenge (credit vips)
crop field revenge (credit vips)

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Re: Astronomically Bad Jokes (Or good)

Post by emc » Wed Oct 17, 2012 2:38 pm

If you ever meet a space alien, do not show fear… make friends and invite them home to dinner… if they don’t eat you then there may be hope for the rest of us.
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Re: Astronomically Bad Jokes (Or good)

Post by bystander » Thu Oct 18, 2012 5:43 pm

emc wrote:If you ever meet a space alien, do not show fear… make friends and invite them home to dinner…
if they don’t eat you then there may be hope for the rest of us.
Click to play embedded YouTube video.
Know the quiet place within your heart and touch the rainbow of possibility; be
alive to the gentle breeze of communication, and please stop being such a jerk.
— Garrison Keillor

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Re: Astronomically Bad Jokes (Or good)

Post by Moonlady » Thu Oct 18, 2012 7:36 pm

Twilight Zone: Where Herman Munster plays Hensel and Gretel :lol2:

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Ann
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Re: Astronomically Bad Jokes (Or good)

Post by Ann » Fri Oct 19, 2012 12:31 am

Moonlady, your crop pattern post is a riot!! :lol2: :lol2: :lol2:

To serve man, yes. I remember I've read at least one science fiction story with that title. The helpful aliens served man... with potatoes and gravy, perhaps?

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Re: Astronomically Bad Jokes (Or good)

Post by Moonlady » Sun Oct 21, 2012 10:35 pm

here a bad one:
DAMN! My nose itches! (credit the outer space guys)
DAMN! My nose itches! (credit the outer space guys)

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Re: Astronomically Bad Jokes (Or good)

Post by Moonlady » Wed Nov 07, 2012 2:03 am

I voted today! :D
election 2012 (credit ST)
election 2012 (credit ST)

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Re: Astronomically Bad Jokes (Or good)

Post by Beyond » Wed Nov 07, 2012 3:24 am

GOOD choice, Moonlady :!: :!:
To find the Truth, you must go Beyond.

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Re: Astronomically Bad Jokes (Or good)

Post by Ann » Wed Nov 07, 2012 5:02 am

:lol2: :lol2: :lol2:

I love it, Moonlady! :lol2: :lol2: :lol2:

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