In today's mailbox

[owlice]

This email:

Date: Wed, 29 Sep 2010 08:47:43 +0200
From: ckeung@telenet.be
To: Mr.Chiu_Wing_Tsang@hkisee.net
Subject: Reply.

Dear friend.

I just want to inform you that I have a deal in my bank worth $35.5,to transact with you.please get back to me for more explanation.
Best regards,
Mr.Tsang.
Executive Director
Chong Hing Bank
(Hong Kong)

My reply:

Oh, sure, but please know that my time is expensive and further emails will require payment for the time it takes to read them. Please send me your full name and bank name and account number so that we may set up the automatic withdrawal process by which I'm to be paid for my time.

I'm always happy to make shady international deals that net me a lot of someone else's money and am delighted to be approached by someone who feels the same way.

Thank you,

Owlice Night

What do you think... did I blow the deal?

[bystander]

Was it from the Bank of England? That's my money! They're supposed to be sending it to me.

I read about a guy who actually swindled a scammer back during the heyday of the Nigerian Bank scams. He got them to send him 1st class airline tickets so that he could come meet with them. He posted the whole email dialog. It was amazing how gullible the scammers were.

[owlice]

Now, now, calm down! It's the Chong Hing Bank, not the Bank of England. We'll both be rich!!

I read of one account where the target got a couple of bucks out of the scammer, which I thought was pretty good, but 1st class airline tickets...!

There's also the tale of someone who had a laptop for sale and was contacted by a scammer (the scammer gets the merchandise, the seller gets nothing). The seller recognized the hallmarks of the scam and ended up sending the guy a "laptop" made out of cardboard or some such; the mockup of the laptop was pretty amusing in and of itself. He even arranged to have the pickup of the package videotaped -- someone in the scammer's host country volunteered to do this! This was all discussed in an online community, so there's a thread out there in cyberspace about this somewhere, or was. The seller's eager, innocent emails to the scammer were just a teensy over the top, IIRC, and perhaps should have tipped off the scammer that something wasn't quite right about the situation, but he bought it anyway.

[owlice]

heh. Just Googled "scam laptop fake" and it's the first hit. Merry reading! http://www.zug.com/pranks/powerbook/
(Warning for bad language.)

[owlice]

The reply from "Mr.Tsang":

Dear friend,
Thank you for your response and interest. However, my communication with you is in reference to an investment involving Iraqi Liquid Gas Factory director (Mr. Hammam al-Alil) that made a fixed deposit in my bank.

He had a financial portfolio of USD$35.5 Million and this I help turned over in the purchase of securities in the capital markets. I was the bank adviser assisting him in the management of the fund, being previously given the instruction to liquidate the investment made by Mr. Hammam, after sometime to enable him pursue some other investment requiring cash payment in Europe. I made effort to contact Mr. Hammam in the line of duty for some final instruction, only to discover that he had been killed in drive-by shooting at Southwest Mosul on 25th March, 2007.

Since the original owner died without the declaration of next of kin, my proposition is this; I want to place you in that position to instruct my bank to release the deposit to you as the closest surviving relation. For your cooperation, your benefit shall be 40% of the total funds, while the balance 60% is for me.
To initiate this process to conclusion, i need you to email me your full name, address and a private telephone number. So that my attorney can commence on the backup documents that will place you as the next of kin to Mr. Hammam. I will use my position to influence the move of the funds to the bank account that will be provided by you, after you have been made the next of kin.

There is no risk involved in this proceedings, as we are going to adopt a legalized method and my attorney shall prepare all the necessary documents in your name. As soon as i receive your full name, address and telephone number. I am very confident that we will be able to establish the trust that is needed to complete this deal, all that I need is your willingness and commitment, so that we can conclude the transaction in 10 working days.

Please observe utmost discretion in all matters concerning this transaction, awaiting your quick reply as soon as possible.
Sincerely,
Mr.Tsang
Executive Director
Chong Hing Bank

HOW do people fall for this?!?!

My response:

Mr. Tsang,

Please send me your full name and bank name and account number so that we may set up the automatic withdrawal process by which I'm to be paid for my time. As it took me about four minutes to read and make notes of your email below and one minute to type this, you now owe me 100$US. After I receive this information and payment for services already rendered, we can proceed.

Thank you,

Owlice Night

[jman]

Request the airline tickets!

[owlice]

lol!!

[owlice]

He wrote back, with the same email as yesterday.

My response:

Mr. Tsang,

Repeating yourself is not going to make me give my time away for free. Any response from you to this email will constitute your agreement to pay me my hourly fee, over and able any ill-gotten gains as outlined in your email below, of 1200$US per hour. Payment for my time must be done in an ongoing basis and must be made by electronic withdrawal, which requires the name of your bank and account number. Please forward this information immediately.

Unless you agree to these terms -- and a reply, any reply, to this email will constitute agreement with the terms I have specified -- we will be unable to work together. Payment for my time must be made at time of services, within 24 hours. Your bill of 160$US is already overdue. Please take steps to rectify the situation immediately or look elsewhere for your patsy.

Thank you,

Owlice Night